12 YEARS TODAY

11/02/05

TODAY IS JUST NOT LIKE ANY OTHER DAY; TODAY IS 12 YEARS TO THE DAY, MY FATHER PASSED AWAY TO CANCER. (I WAS 22 AT THE TIME)

I REMEMBER THE DAY PRETTY GOOD, TO THE POINT IT HAUNTS ME FROM TIME TO TIME.

MY FATHER WAS IN BED AFTER HE CAME HOME FROM THE HOSIPITAL BECAUSE NO ONE WANTS TO DIE IN A HOSPITAL THESE DAYS. I CAN SEE HIM FADING, AND GETTING WEAKER. THE DOCTOR WAS THERE, AS WELL AS MY GRANDPARENTS AND MY MOM.

THE BAND I WAS IN AT THE TIME HAD A GIG IN GARDEN GROVE AT THE NOW DEFUNCT ‘MARQUEE’ AND I WAS NUMB AS SHIT, NOT KNOWING IF MY DAD WAS GOING TO PULL THRU.

THEN HE PASSED.

I FELT MY BODY WEAKEN AND MY HEART BREAK. MY HERO WAS GONE.

I WALKED OUT TO THE FRONT DOOR OF THE HOUSE, WHERE MY AUNT (HIS SISTER) HAD GOTTEN BACK FROM SOME ERRANDS AND SHE SAW THE LOOK IN MY EYES AND JUST KNEW.

I WANTED A FEW MINUTES ALONE WITH MY FATHER, AND I JUST CRIED AND WAS ANGRY AT HIM FOR LEAVING US. BUT I THOUGHT: HE WAS NO LONGER IN PAIN, AND FREE OF PAIN.

THE HOSPITAL CAME AND GOT MY FATHER, AND PLACED HIM ONTO THE GURNEY.

I GOT ON THE PHONE WHERE I CALLED MY BEST FRIEND JIM AND TOLD HIM THE NEWS.

I ALSO CALLED MY BASS PLAYER, DAVE AND TOLD HIM THE NEWS.
THE GIG WAS CANCELLED IMMEDIATELY.

WHAT REALLY KILLED ME WAS WHEN THE PEOPLE TOOK HIM OUT ON THE GURNEY, OUR CAT; ‘MIKEY’ WAS FOLLOWING HIM OUT- I LOST IT!

MY MOM AND I HAD TO DEAL WITH THE FUNERAL ARRANGEMENTS, BUT I GOT TO PICK THE CASKET THAT I KNOW MY DAD WOULD HAVE BEEN STOKED ON!
(HE WAS A HUGE HOT ROD FANATIC!! MEMBER OF BOTH ‘THE SULTANS’ AND ‘THE EARLY TIMES CAR CLUB’) HE HAD 5 CLASSIC CARS THAT HE LOVED TO GO CRUISING IN WITH MY MOM!

THE CASKET WAS KIND OF CUSTOM HOT ROD, BECAUSE IT HAD ACTUAL PIN-STRIPING, AND VELVET INTERIOR!! I SAW IT AND SAID ‘THIS IS DADS’ CASKET!!’

NO ONE ARGUED WITH ME.

THE FUNERAL WAS SATURDAY AT THE FOREST LAWN IN CYPRESS, CA.

THE TURN-OUT WAS BEYOND WHAT I HAD ANTICIPATED. PEOPLE THOUGHT IT WAS A CAR SHOW! BOTH CAR CLUBS BROUGHT THEIR VEHICLES TO THE SERVICE AND IT WAS SWAMPED WITH CARS! (I WAS REALLY TOUCHED!)

ALL MY FRIENDS WERE THERE, MY BAND WAS THERE, AND OLD FAMILY FRIENDS WERE THERE.

I REMEMBER LOOKING AT MY GRANDPARENTS, AND SEEING HOW CRUSHED THEY WERE BURYING THEIR FIRST BORN SON. MY GRANDFATHER WAS NUMB.

AFTER EVERYONE LEFT, I STAYED TO WATCH THE GROUNDSKEEPERS LOWER MY FATHER INTO THE EARTH. MY COUSIN SETH STAYED BEHIND WITH ME AND GAVE ME A RIDE HOME.

I GOT HOME WHERE PEOPLE WERE THERE TO SUPPORT MY MOM, SISTER AND I. MOST OF MY DAD’S FRIENDS WERE CHECKING OUT THE CARS AND REMINISCING
ON THE OLD TIMES WITH ‘BILL’.

THE REST OF THE YEAR WAS NEW TO ME TO CELEBRATE THE HOLIDAYS FOR THE FIRST TIME WITHOUT MY DAD BEING THERE.

THANKSGIVING ’93 SUCKED!
CHRISTMAS ’93 SUCKED AS WELL!!

A MAGAZINE CALLED ‘STREET RODDER’ DID A SMALL HOMAGE TO HIM, I THOUGHT THAT WAS COOL!!
MY DAD WAS ALSO A CITY INSPECTOR FOR THE CITY OF LONG BEACH, AND AT ONE OF HIS JOB SITES BY L.B.C.C., THEY CEMENTED A PLAQUE INTO THE GROUND IN HONOR OF HIM.
ALSO THE MAYOR GAVE HIM SPECIAL RECOGNITION ON CABLE TV, HONORING MY DAD.

I THINK ABOUT THAT TIME I STARTED TO SELF DESTRUCT AS WELL. NOT WITH DRUGS OR ALCOHOL, BUT SERIOUS DEPRESSION. LUCKILY I HAD A BAND TO LET ALL THAT ANGER OUT (I’M A DRUMMER BY THE WAY) .

LOSING MY GRANDFATHER IN 1996.
LOSING MY GRANDMOTHER IN JUNE OF 2005.

I’M THE LAST WITH THE FAMILY NAME, SO I HOPE THAT WHEN MY GIRL AND I DO DECIDE TO HAVE KIDS, AND IF WE HAVE A SON; I WANT TO HONOR MY FATHER WITH NAMING HIM ‘WILLIAM MATTHEW’

AN OLD FRIEND OF MINE SHOWED ME THIS SECTION OF A MAGAZINE IN 2004 CALLED ‘STREET RODDERS JOURNAL’ WHICH IS PUBLISHED A FEW TIMES OUT OF THE YEAR, AND IT HAD A STORY ON MY DAD FROM THE 70’S WHEN HE AND A FELLOW EARLY TIMES CAR CLUB MEMBER MARK KRUTZ, ENTERED A ‘STUPID CONTEST’ (AFTER A FEW BEERS OF COURSE) TO SEE WHO COULD DRIVE INTO THE WATER WITH THEIR CLASSIC CARS BEFORE FLOODING THE CARS.
MY DAD ‘WON’ WHEN HE FLOODED OUT HIS 34 DODGE SEDAN!! (I’LL GET THE PICTURE AND ARTICLE POSTED SOON)

I MISS YOU DAD, EVERY FUCKING DAY!!! NOT A DAY GOES BY THAT I DON’T THINK ABOUT YOU IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER. I KNOW THAT YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN PROUD OF ME AND AMY. (AND MOM!)


WILLIAM HAROLD “BILL” BAUGH
DECEMBER 21ST, 1941 – NOVEMBER 2ND, 1993
GONE, BUT NEVER FORGOTTEN!!